Jay Smith, Consultant

By Vincent Truman On May 28th, 2009

selfJay Smith, Consultant to Vincent Truman

 

Hi Vincent,

 

A pleasant day.  I’m Jay Smith a Marketing Specialist in Bookwhirl.com.

 

I came across your book entitled, “Touching Base” .We are interested to promote it and we’d like to help you reach out up to 5,000,000 individuals and let them know about you and your work.   If you are interested, please give me a call at 1 877 207-1679 ext 307 or you may reply to this email. I’d be grateful to give you more information about this.

 

Hope to hear from you soon

 

Sincerely,

Jay Smith

Consultant

 

 

Vincent Truman to Jay Smith, Consultant

 

Dear Jay:

 

Thanks for your email.  I’d be interested in hearing a bit more from you on the topic of promoting ‘Touching Base’.  Specifically, if you can give me an idea of the ideal demographic you would market ‘Touching Base’ to and how you arrived at such an idea, that would be great. 

 

Best,

 

Vincent

 

 

 

Jay Smith, Consultant to Vincent Truman

 

Hi Vincent,

 

Thank you for this prompt reply. Yes we can promote your book through a targeted market. Because we have this service which is Email Ad Campaign this is very aggressive since we will create a massive e-mail broadcast of your book that are specially designed to hit e-mail subscriber who have opted to receive commercial marketing messages, according to their specific interest. So with regard to your book we will send an ad to interested recipients only so there will be a big possibility that you will have more book sales.

 

Please let me know if you have any questions I’ll be happy to answer it.

 

Thanks.

 

Sincerely,

Jay Smith

Consultant

 

 

Vincent Truman to Jay Smith, Consultant

 

Jay:

 

Thanks so much for replying!  Where did you see my book and how did you choose that title out of all of the others?

 

Thanks again -

 

Vincent

 

 

Jay Smith, Consultant to Vincent Truman

 

Hi Vincent,

 

We have a researcher in our company and their job is to search for potential authors and their works. And if our research team found out that the book has potential and substance they will going to give the lists of authors and their corresponding information to me and as a specialist I’ll be the one to help authors promote their books through our services. I hope I was able to answer all the questions that you’ve asked.

 

Thanks.

 

 Sincerely,

Jay Smith

Consultant

 

Vincent Truman to Jay Smith, Consultant

 

Jay:

 

Thanks again for your timely answer.  Unfortunately, both of my simple questions seem to have generated vague, unsatisfying responses.  They could be about any author, any book.

 

As you know, a major component of marketing is the first impression that a marketing team or specialist conveys.    Another component is engaging the target on a personal level.  I fear you have failed on both of these levels and I have a hard time thinking your marketing campaign would be any more focused or representative of what I have produced to date. 

 

Thank you for your interest.  If you have any questions, please do not hesitate to ask.

 

Best,

 

Vincent

 

 

Jay Smith, Consultant to Vincent Truman

 

Hi Vincent,

 

I understand your decision. Well, if that’s what you think I can’t do something about it. Anyway, good luck to your books I hope it will do well.

 

Sincerely,

Jay Smith

Consultant

 

 

 

Vincent Truman to Jay Smith, Consultant

 

Many thanks, Jay!

 

I do want you to know that I offer proofreading and tutoring services and would be delighted to assist you.  For instance, “good luck to your books I hope it will do well” is confusing.  You rightly wrote I have “books” (plural) but then you hope that “it” (singular) does well.  Additionally, you conveyed two separate thoughts yet failed to separate them with a period or semi-colon.  You will certainly agree that marketing books yet conveying little knowledge of language and grammar might negatively impact your success.

 

However, I am confident I can help you reverse that and obtain greater success.  Act now and I will give you the first consultation (above) for free!

 

I look forward to hearing from you and helping you realize your dreams!

 

Best,

 

Vincent

 

 

2 Responses to “Jay Smith, Consultant”

  1. You are a twisted, brilliant man. I love you. Thanks for brightening my day.

    Jen

  2. is this for real? if so, this is great. and even if not, it is hilarious.

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